Full Careers - Honestly, (see pic) will my looks interfere with my counseling career?

Honestly, (see pic) will my looks interfere with my counseling career?

I am currently getting my masters in counseling, and in the future I want to work as a marriage/couples therapist. I'll graduate in about 2 years. I also work as a cocktail waitress at a nice restaurant...sometimes customers ask me about myself, and a lot of times the men laugh when i tell them I want to be a marriage therapist, and say things like "There's no way my wife would let someone like YOU be our therapist, it would make the problem worse! hahah."...I think meaning that since i am an attractive female, married women won't want me to be their counselor. Do you think this is true??? Or is that ridiculous? Men and women, please both respond with what you would think. Here's a link to a picture of me...be honest with what you think. No big deal, problems, etc. (Obviously I won't be wearing anything low-cut or inappropriate when seeing clients! Keep that in mind). http://i68.photobucket.com/albums/i7/kujayhawk3eb/02_01_8.jpg http://i68.photobucket.com/albums/i7/kujayhawk3eb/Nov10256.jpg I know not only ugly people can be therapists, but i realize that a lot of marital problems will deal with issues of infidelity and insecurity, and I just wonder if being attractive could make things worse. OK WHOA Clcalifornia...this catty-ness is exactly what i am talking about. I think what i am asking is a legit question. It's ridiculous that a person can't acknowledge the fact that they are attractive and ask a serious question about it without being called self-centered. I am not caught up in my looks because i am asking this question. It would have never occured to me, had no one said anything. Just because someone is attractive, this means they "can't see beyond the mirror"? Wow. About my job: I work at a nice steakhouse, not a bar...i just take the tables in the bar section of the restaurant. I make a lot of money in only 2 shifts a week, its the only way i can afford school. FYI. WHAT??? I am too 23, born in 1983, graduated hs in 2001, college in 2005! what the hell!

Public Comments

YOU WOULD BE OK! WHO EVER TOLD YOU THAT WAS TRYING TO PICK YOU UP!
I think you are pretty and that might be intimidating to bitter or resentful or insecure women, but I think if you are professional you will be OK. Don't listen to nay sayers!
As long as you remain professional and do your job well then everything will be fine. -NmD!
You are a very attractive woman. Very very sexy.
I don't think it matters as long as you dress for the job- I don't think only ugly people can be therapists.... good luck-
If you dress and act professional then you should not have any problems, You look great keep up the good work.
You are very attractive, but it's silly to think that mature people with real problems would allow your looks to deter them from taking advantage of your counselling. If a couple cared enough to go through with seeing a counsellor, then it's likely that it wouldn't matter what you looked like. In the event that it did play a part, then some key points to the solution of their problem would be revealed and your job would be much easier.
Do you think I am too pretty to be a counseling people with marriage problems? D0 you think that the men will want to be with me? Will the women hate me? Honest tell me what you think. I am older and younger guys go for me? Will my career fail becasue I am so beautiful and wise? Come on....maybe you are too sexy for your career. More like too focuesd on self. It is a bit scary.
With your looks...and this question...on this service...sounds to me like you need to get counceling...How much attention do you really need???? A therapist is a therapist....a needy person that comes to you doesn't give a rat's a.. what you look like if you are good at your profession. That's like asking if a good looking neurosurgeon has the credintials to operate. Go back to school...or see a therapist yourself.
I think you are fishing for compliments. My opinion would be, just don't dress like a cocktail waitress when you are working as a marriage councilor.
Tricky question, my first impulse would say, I'd be distracted for sure. But if you're professional, helpful, and they really want your help, it shouldn't matter. If you were in a relationship or even married yourself, that would not only give you credibility, but might diffuse your beauty. Good luck
you are quite a good looker ,but you also look as thou you could dress and look quite professional. There will be times when you may have problems but im willing to bet it would be the mental capasity of your client not the fact that your a good looking woman. I would say continue your studies and follow thru with your plan.Dont blame yourself for someone elses shallowness. Good luck,ROCKY
Obviously professionalism is the key, no matter how you look. In many ways, being attractive can work to your advantage, as you will have no doubt experienced. Attractive people are seen as easier to relate to, warmer, and more empathic than their less attractive peers. I'm sure you have seen these studies. Your looks should give you no more problems in counseling then they give you in everyday life and indeed may well work to your benefit. Good luck in your future career.
I am not that attracted to bottle blonde's or women that think they are too pretty. A woman may find you a threat sitting there looking all that time in her husbands eyes. Being a counselor, you are aware most women wear makeup to look good to other women or men, not their husbands they don't see most of the day. What you should be more concerned with is your age and book education.Older couples would not listen with you as much. To have a degree in counseling and psychology courses you should be more concerned of your abilities and strengths than what couples think of your looks. If I had a big nose, should I be concerned couples not approve of me? You need more maturity I feel, no bad intentions, Luck..
I don't think it is the career for you if you are so caught up in your looks.
I was raised by a woman's psychologist and find your question about vanity ridiculous. How can you expect to show people open doors when you are centered around yourself. To take a poll of persons to see your web site to give a view based on something women feel pressure to look ,feel, and act by society. I think your question demeans women. Kudos to having a wonderful self esteem. Personally I think you need to look deeper into yourself and understand...persons coming to seek help are not looking for a person that worries about her self image.... I color my hair many different colors......I am 39 and male ....My grandmother told me it was my job to bring a smile to a stranger everyday. That positive energy will run and help balance the evils of others.. I laugh at how many strangers approach from young to old.... My point I think your in the wrong career choice...... One can not help others if they can not see beyond there own mirror
very long question
I think this is a very interesting question, because I've noticed that therapists and psychiatrists seem to have an "act" that they hide behind that isn't quite a normal person. I've also noticed that it works... The way you look is extremely important to gaining people's trust and making them feel at ease, especially people with low self-esteem, which you will be meeting regularly. If the person feels like you're just a regular person that's going to be hanging out drinking after work, telling everyone about the nut that you spoke with that day, then they aren't going to trust you with things they don't want to admit to anyone. My advice: Put your hair up, wear frumpy plain clothes, intellectual looking glasses, no make-up...develop a character that makes people relax around you. You're "the counselor", not "a girl that went to college for counseling". And most of all, be good at your job.
I don't care what my therapist looks like, so long as he or she is competent, compassionate and genuine. (And has a sense of humor. That's a big plus.) And, assuming you take the ethics of your profession seriously, it doesn't matter if your clients think you're hot. In fact, you are so totally, 100 percent, absolutely off-limits they might not even notice what you look like.
If you dress conservatively, it will do wonders in family counseling, especially with children. Stay away with sex abuse cases. As long as you're young, you'll be less effective with adults who will trust older. Sorry, nothing you can do about it, but realize younger couples might better trust someone closer to their age, and older couples wouldn't trust some one so young. But every therapist knows, the wise patient will "interview" several counselors and pick the one that both or all are comfortable with. It might be you.... but if it's not, it will be for someone else. And a bar is probaly much more stimulating than dealing with those stuck-up a** that have to have BMW's. Being pretty, you could also relate to the problems of pretty women. I's reminded of a pretty women I met at a bar complaining about how all her boyfriends end up jerks. She must be a jerk magnet. I told her,"look pretty women attract everything, she only lets the jerks in." Have I rambled on enough yet?
Get the book by John T Molloy called "the new women's dress for success" in it are great suggestions. In fact my wife followed them and in ONE day everyone in her office treated her different. This is an indispensable book for anyone going into a field like yours. Good luck in your career P.S. change jobs. Sell BMWs or something your too smart to waste your time in a bar.
Honestly, I think you should go ahead with your career plans. If counseling is what you love then do it. I wouldn't have a problem with you as a counselor as long as you dress and act professionally. You are a pretty woman but I would not, in any way feel threatened by you. Now, if a counselor looked like Marilyn Monroe...I might feel differently. Anyway, goodluck!
Along your path to success, if you find a couple that is not a working match...you have the right to refer them to another counselor. Not all working relationships will be a perfect match, but stand your ground in a firm manner if your dignity is being mocked. I am seeking my masters in social/clinical psychology. I am also an attractive married female. When clients attempt to hit on me, I follow the ethics principal. I have received comments, such as, "You are too beautiful to have brains," and, "Man, I could use a woman like you!" That behavior is unacceptable, and I reiterate to them (in a professional manner) that their behavior is inappropriate. To answer your question, brains supersede beauty. You will be able to think of tactful ways to deal with difficult situations. I will never need a marriage counselor but "IF" I did, I would hire you. Additional Info: Did you know that Marcia Cross on the show, "Desperate Housewives" has her Masters in Psychology? I have only watched the show a few times. Apparentally writes her own script. Her character has a dry, and comical wit about her...it is quite comical if you watch the hidden meanings behind her words.
Just the very question says you should quit now and seek therapy for your self.
I can see why you might be concerned because you are HOT!! These guys were flirting with you or trying to do the dirty with you on their wives. Don't let that sort of thing get in the way of your passion for your work.
Ok.......lets talk.....there was a study done a few years back and repeated on a TV show where they changed a persons race.....Any way the study was about Beauty.....a attractive man went in to a female store asking for assistance and was pounced on ....A older fat balding guy with a non-matching outfit got ignored. The same holds true here ....Your easy on the eyes and that may cause transference from the guys and resentment & envy from the ladies. Your right looks shouldn't matter....but people don't always follow the rules .... When people are valued for the content of the soul and mind ....instead of thier cup size or gleaming smile ...jails will be empty and the world will be a much nicer place...... Till then .... I wish you all the best in your chosen profession ... may your get the best clients who seek only your input and not your phone number ! Trust in your abilities & instincts.
we men are idiots..its a statistical fact that people lesson to attractive people...i am not saying its right..just that we as a people hold value in appearance
That all depends. I think my wife is more beautiful but that doesn't mean I don't fantasize about other woman. Some not so attractive as you or my wife. So I guess it doesn't matter. Nor should it matter Just think of it this way. If it is true then you may only have a hard time at first. Sooner or later (probably around 40) you'll hit the wall like all the rest and your career will probably take off. LMAO Sorry. I just looked at the second pic. Stop lying. You are not 23. More like 28-30.
I went through counseling with a now ex wife with a therapist who was very, very attractive. You are a beautiful woman but to be honest, this woman was far more attractive. I found her to be inteligent and insightful. She was a good therapist and did her best to help us. I did find it a bit uncomfortable at first in that I found her physically attractive but that soon was not an issue because it was clear that she was a professional and was there to help us. Unbeknownst to the therapist and I, my ex was a meth freak and was more interested in getting into the counselors pants than working on our problems. Most of which were caused by her drug abuse. Got to love those meth freaks!Bitter? Yeah, a little.
I don't think it should matter to anyone about your mouth or your nose - people would be coming to you for help, they won't worry about your looks and those little things that are wrong. Don't be so self-conscious about your looks, your self-esteem is important, especially if you want to be a therapist! It'll be okay!
OK, at first I thought this was a stupid question from someone who thinks very highly of themselves and want/need attention. But I remember being rushed to the hospital because I was not feeling well and a fine, young, hand-son man walked into my room and said that he was going to do my EKG, I was nude under the covers from the waist up. He looked at me with such a beautiful smile and I said "no way" get me somebody else, you are way to fine. They sent in a female nurse who laughed and said "he is cute isn't he" we both laughed and she did my EKG. Last, my sister is a Head Nurse and a anesthesiologist. She is young, black, and beautiful as well as very smart. There has been many times that white patients have asked for someone else when she enters their hospital room..She then informs them of the college she went to, her grades, her outstanding awards, and her ability to take care of them. They normally smile, say I am sorry, and allow her to perform the medical task. Best of luck !
Sweet Kelly, I am 58 years old and married. You do not need your masters to counsel me. I am ready for you to talk to me any time. E-mail me and we can talk. The other idiots that are giving their remarks about your good looks are just jealous. It isn't every day that one comes across an intelligent,hard working and good looking lady such as yourself.